When Your Mind Knows You’re Safe—But Your Body Doesn’t

Maybe you’ve done the reading.

You’ve talked about your past.

You understand where some of your patterns came from.

You may even know exactly what you should be doing differently.

But your body doesn’t seem to have gotten the message.

Your heart races.

You feel constantly on edge.

You shut down when things become overwhelming.

You have trouble relaxing, sleeping, connecting, or feeling fully present.

Or sometimes you don’t feel much of anything at all.

You may have spent years trying to think your way out of these patterns.

Somatic Experiencing offers another way to work with them.

At Inner Sight Colorado, I use Somatic Experiencing as part of a broader trauma-focused approach to help people develop greater awareness of what is happening in their bodies, increase their capacity to tolerate difficult experiences, and move toward feeling safer, more present, and more connected.

Schedule a Free 15-Minute Consultation

720-939-9379

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What If the Problem Isn’t Just in Your Head?

We often assume that if we can understand something intellectually, we should be able to change it.

But trauma and chronic stress don’t always work that way.

You can know:

“I’m safe now.”

And still feel your body tense when someone raises their voice.

You can know:

“That relationship is over.”

And still feel anxious when something reminds you of it.

You can know:

“I don’t need to be afraid anymore.”

And still find yourself avoiding, shutting down, people-pleasing, fighting, or staying constantly alert.

This can be incredibly frustrating.

Especially when you’ve already done a lot of work on yourself.

Somatic Experiencing starts with a different question:

What is happening in your body right now?

Instead of trying to force yourself to think differently, we learn to notice what your nervous system is doing and gradually develop new ways of responding.

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What Is Somatic Experiencing?

Somatic Experiencing, often called SE, is a body-oriented approach to working with trauma and stress.

Rather than focusing exclusively on thoughts and stories, SE brings attention to physical sensations, emotions, movement, impulses, and the ways your body responds to what you’re experiencing.

That doesn’t mean ignoring your thoughts.

It means recognizing that your experience is more than your thoughts alone.

During therapy, we may pay attention to things such as:

• tension

• tightness

• heaviness

• changes in breathing

• temperature

• sensations of movement or stillness

• impulses to move, protect yourself, withdraw, or connect

• feelings of activation or shutdown

The goal isn’t to force a particular response.

It’s to develop greater awareness and capacity so that difficult experiences can be approached without becoming overwhelmed or disconnected.

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You Don’t Have to Force Yourself to Feel Better

One of the things I appreciate about Somatic Experiencing is that it doesn’t require you to charge directly into the most painful thing you’ve ever experienced.

In fact, going too fast can be counterproductive.

We work gradually.

We notice what is happening.

We find moments of stability and safety.

We learn what your system can tolerate.

And then, when you’re ready, we work with what’s difficult.

This approach can be particularly helpful for people who have learned to cope by:

• shutting down

• disconnecting

• staying busy

• intellectualizing

• avoiding emotions

• constantly staying alert

• controlling everything they can

• taking care of everyone else

• pushing through no matter how exhausted they are

Sometimes the problem isn’t that you’re not trying hard enough.

You’ve been trying incredibly hard for a very long time.

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What Can Somatic Experiencing Help With?

Somatic Experiencing is particularly associated with trauma and stress-related difficulties.

In therapy, I may incorporate SE when you’re dealing with:

Trauma

Experiences that continue to affect how you feel, react, or relate to others.

Chronic Stress

Feeling like you’re constantly “on” and can’t truly relax.

Anxiety

Physical activation, tension, racing thoughts, or feeling constantly on guard.

Emotional Shutdown

Feeling numb, disconnected, detached, or unable to access emotions.

Relationship Trauma

When past relationships have left you hypervigilant, guarded, or unsure of yourself.

Childhood Experiences

Early experiences that continue to influence your responses in adulthood.

Overwhelm

When ordinary demands seem to push you beyond your ability to cope.

Feeling Disconnected From Yourself

When you’ve become so accustomed to functioning that you barely notice what you’re actually feeling.

SE isn’t necessarily the only approach we’ll use.

The goal is to find what helps you—not to force every problem into one particular therapy.

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What Does a Somatic Experiencing Session Look Like?

You might be surprised by how ordinary a session can look.

We’ll talk.

I’ll ask questions.

You’ll tell me what’s going on in your life.

But I’ll also occasionally invite you to slow down and notice what’s happening physically.

For example:

“What do you notice in your body as you talk about that?”

Or:

“What happens inside when you say that?”

Or:

“Let’s stay with that sensation for just a moment.”

You don’t need to know how to do this.

That’s my job.

I’ll help you develop the awareness and skills to notice what’s happening without becoming overwhelmed by it.

And you can always tell me to slow down, stop, or change direction.

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What Does “Bottom-Up” Therapy Mean?

Traditional talk therapy often begins with thoughts, beliefs, and conscious understanding and then works toward emotional change.

A bottom-up approach pays more attention to what’s happening physically and emotionally first.

Instead of:

Think differently → feel differently → behave differently

we may work more like:

Notice → regulate → process → understand → choose

This doesn’t mean your thinking isn’t important.

It means that sometimes your thinking brain logically understands the situation.

Your body is the part that has a very different take on things and can easily override logic.

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What If I Don’t Feel Anything?

That’s okay.

Some people come to therapy highly anxious and activated.

Others come feeling numb.

Disconnected.

Flat.

They may say:

“I don’t even know what I’m supposed to be feeling.”

You don’t have to manufacture an emotion.

Sometimes feeling disconnected from your body is itself an important piece of information.

We’ll start wherever you are.

And we’ll work gradually toward being more present and aware without forcing anything.

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What If I Feel Too Much?

That’s also something we can work with.

If you’re someone who feels everything intensely, you may have learned that the safest option is to avoid emotions altogether.

Somatic Experiencing isn’t about throwing open the floodgates.

It’s about developing the ability to experience sensations and emotions in manageable amounts.

We can slow down.

Shift attention.

Notice something neutral or positive.

Orient to your surroundings.

Come back to the present.

The goal is not to overwhelm you.

The goal is to increase your capacity to stay present when life gets difficult.

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Somatic Experiencing and EMDR

I use both Somatic Experiencing and EMDR in my practice for trauma work because together they really work well together even if they are fairly different.

EMDR can be particularly useful for processing specific traumatic experiences and the beliefs, emotions, and memories associated with them.

Somatic Experiencing places greater emphasis on your nervous system and your moment-to-moment physical and emotional experience and your capacity to remain present while working with difficult material.

Sometimes one approach makes more sense.

Sometimes we use both.

And sometimes another approach is more appropriate.

I don’t believe you should have to fit yourself into a particular therapy model.

The therapy should fit you.

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Why Somatic Experiencing Became So Important to My Work

My interest in Somatic Experiencing is personal.

I’ve been on the other side of the therapy relationship.

After struggling with depression, anxiety, and difficult experiences in my own life, I eventually found a therapist who introduced me to EMDR.

That experience changed the direction of my life.

Later, I discovered Somatic Experiencing.

And while EMDR had helped me heal in profound ways, SE gave me another way to understand what was happening inside me.

It helped me become more aware of my body and how I responded to stress, emotions, and difficult experiences.

As I’ve continued doing this work for more than 15 years, those experiences have shaped the way I work with my own clients.

I don’t just want you to understand yourself better.

I want you to have the opportunity to experience something different.

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My Approach Is More Than Somatic Experiencing

Somatic Experiencing is one of the primary tools I use, but it isn’t the entire therapy.

I also draw from EMDR, mindfulness, existential approaches, and other therapeutic methods depending on what makes sense for the person sitting across from me.

Sometimes we need to work with your body.

Sometimes we need to understand a relationship.

Sometimes we need to challenge a belief.

Sometimes we need to process a traumatic memory.

And sometimes we need to laugh because life can be absurd as hell.

Therapy should be collaborative, practical, and tailored to you.

My goal isn’t to keep you in therapy forever.

My goal is meaningful change.

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What Makes This Approach Different?

I Pay Attention to More Than Your Words

What you say matters.

So does what happens inside you while you’re saying it.

I Work Gradually

Trauma work doesn’t have to mean diving into the deepest pain immediately.

We build the capacity to approach difficult material safely.

I’ve Experienced This Work Myself

I’ve personally experienced both EMDR and Somatic Experiencing and understand what it is like to sit in the client’s chair.

More Than 15 Years of Experience

I’ve worked with people dealing with trauma, anxiety, depression, crisis, and difficult life circumstances in a variety of settings.

You Remain in Control

You can tell me when something is too much, too fast, or simply isn’t working.

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What Clients Say

“Steve emits boundless positivity. He is at once fun-loving, light-hearted, serious, and dedicated. I’ve trusted him with some deep-seated problems, and he’s delivered. 6 stars!”

— Shae, Denver, CO

“Steve is a knowledgeable and caring therapist, well-versed in the treatment of trauma.”

— Bridget, Boulder, CO

“When I first came to see Steve, life was dull. There was nothing exciting anymore and I had a lot of anger from traumas. Steve helped me get rid of those things and helped me see that I was not doing what I really wanted in my life.”

— Michael, Denver, CO

Individual experiences vary, and testimonials are not a guarantee of treatment outcomes.

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What If I’ve Already Tried Therapy?

You may have already spent years talking about your problems.

Maybe you’ve learned where they came from.

Maybe you’ve read the books.

Maybe you’ve learned meditation.

Maybe you’ve tried medication.

Maybe you’ve become very good at explaining exactly why you feel the way you do.

And yet…

you still don’t feel like yourself.

That doesn’t mean you failed at therapy.

It may simply mean that another approach is worth exploring.

Somatic Experiencing can offer a different way of working with the experiences that continue to affect you.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Is Somatic Experiencing the same as massage?

No.

SE is a form of body-oriented psychotherapy. We may pay attention to physical sensations and movement, but it isn’t massage.

Do you have to touch me during Somatic Experiencing?

No.

Touch is not required for SE, and any physical contact would only occur when appropriate and with your explicit consent.

Do I have to talk about my trauma?

Not necessarily.

We’ll talk about what is relevant to your treatment, but SE doesn’t require you to provide a detailed narrative of every traumatic experience.

Will I have to relive traumatic experiences?

No.

The goal is not to overwhelm you or make you repeatedly relive painful experiences. We work gradually and pay attention to your capacity to remain present.

Is Somatic Experiencing only for trauma?

SE is particularly associated with trauma and stress, but body awareness and regulation skills can be useful in working with anxiety, chronic stress, emotional shutdown, and other difficulties.

How long does Somatic Experiencing take?

There isn’t a fixed number of sessions. Everyone’s circumstances are different, and we’ll continually evaluate whether the work is helping you move toward your goals.

Can Somatic Experiencing be combined with EMDR?

Yes. Depending on your needs, I may incorporate both approaches into your treatment.

What if I’m uncomfortable focusing on my body?

That’s completely okay.

For some people with trauma histories, paying attention to physical sensations can initially feel uncomfortable or even unsafe. We can work slowly and establish enough safety before asking you to focus more closely on bodily sensations.

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You Don’t Have to Stay in Survival Mode

Maybe you’ve been strong for too long.

Maybe you’ve gotten very good at functioning while feeling terrible inside.

Maybe everyone around you thinks you’re doing fine.

But you know something isn’t right.

You don’t have to force yourself to simply tolerate it.

You can learn a different way of responding to what life has thrown at you.

If you’d like to explore whether Somatic Experiencing is appropriate for you, let’s talk.

Schedule a Free 15-Minute Consultation

720-939-9379

[Request an Appointment]

Inner Sight Colorado LLC
68 Inverness Lane East, Suite 105
Englewood, CO 80112

Somatic Experiencing Therapy in Englewood, Colorado